Artist description punkie!

Music Style IMPROVISATIONAL PUNK

Musical Influences The Fall, Minutemen

Similar Artists Ween, The Fall, Minutemen

Artist History The band actually started in '84 with dave [the guy who started this page] ted [a guy who works in a grocery store and loves to be crank called...by the way, his number is...{insert ted's number, maybe leave off the last digit so they have to guess} and he is not very big, so you don't have to worry about him kicking your ass or anything] and a skinny little doofus named todd. todd used to have the best collection of pornography that I have ever seen, [and I have seen a few, believe me] but I haven't checked recently...he might have let it slide since he got a dog...you know, got all domestic and shit. Anyway, these three guys got all inspired by the DIY sounds of bands like the minutemen, but not actually inspired enough to not suck when they played at parties and shit. They went on sucking for a bunch of years, playing with different people and basically just making fun of the redneck losers that they grew up with [you think the clash were bored with the usa? shit, they've never even BEEN to Jewett City.] and not getting any better musically. I entered the picture somewhere like 87. I was a freshman in college for like the third year in a row, and had spent a bunch of pell grants on amplifiers and guitars and stuff. I think they were initially driven to contact me because I had equipment, but couldn't play it well enough to break their streak of being the worst band ever. Although they lied to me and told me it was cause I was cool, and I was dumb enough to believe them. So I started playing with them, and it was really bad. I used to quit after every show because we never practice and we never play the same thing twice, and it was getting hard for me to find small breasted waif girls to hook up with when the band was around. They bring out the worst in me, and then call it "Mark Drunk," like it was even remotely my fault. So we sucked for a long time, and got mentioned in spin magazine's [can we mention them without getting sued? even if I think they suck now and read bikini instead?] yeah, we were one of one hundred bands mentioned in Spin's worst band in america contest cause we like cheese a lot, even though it makes snot...so, we got mentioned in Spin, the one with perry farrell's other band on the cover [you know], and we were kind of disappointed because we didn't win. The best part was that Ted was long gone by now, working in the grocery, and riding ATV's. Honestly, it is our considered opinion that we suck at least as much as anyone out there...and when you factor in how long we have been together without getting better...we suck worse... and then just when we thought things couldn't get any suckier, we met Bob. He had a lot of piercings, and as I recall, a pretty cute girlfriend, but I might be mistaken. He also had a nice drumset that hardly ever broke like the ones we were using and he was pretty nice to hang out with. After hanging out with dave and todd, just about anyone is pretty nice to hang out with, but bob, even moreso. He had some cool finger tip problems that brought a little drama into the band but I will let him tell you about them, or you can just call ted. [not that he knows, but you can call him anyway.] and suddenly, we sucked inconsistantly. It was like sometimes we were almost as good as any shitty punk band on a given night, and some other times we were just as awful as people were used to hearing us be. We now refer to those days as the golden years, even though it wasn't like years, more like a couple months...but most people don't get it when you say the golden couple of months...they look at you like your crazy.

Group Members Rev. P. Jack Hankering, MC Rhossis, Rev. Bowler Hat, Bob

Instruments geetars, drums and yellin.

Location Jewett City, CT - USA

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