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"Meter Maids (Are Employed by Satan)" attempts to uncover the secrets of the demented world of 'Meter Demons.' Singing of the song can be a purging experience for the common civilian who has felt the sting of pointless, financial penalty thrust upon him by power-hungry-- yet insignificant-- quasi-humans. |
CD: The PseudoGravity Fantasy
Label: The Fattest Man Records
Credits: Music, lyrics, and sound recording copyright 2003 by David M. DiFilippo. Electric Guitar performed by Douglas Adam DiFilippo. |
Story Behind the Song
The motivation for this song is the pure and true hatred for meter maids. I wanted to explore a little bit about how a human being can be raised from an innocent child to, one day, an adult whose main goal in life is to piss off as many people as possible everyday-- as a CAREER! When one gets a parking ticket, there is very little recourse to be taken. This song helps. Sing it loud and sing it proud.
Lyrics
You drive an imitation police car.
And you walk around the town like you're so freakin' bad,
But they don't even let you carry a weapon.
The only defense that you have is a pen and a pad
That you use to write me a parking ticket,
And you stick it underneath my windshield wiper blade,
But you don't stick around to wait for me.
You're such a freaking pussy that you run away.
Because Meter Maids are employed by Satan.
Meter Maids are hired by Beelzebub.
Meter Maids are Lucifer's Slave-Men.
Meter Maids are hired by Beelzebub.
One day did you just go to Satan,
And say, "I'd like to wear a badge and a uniform,
But I'm too scared to be a policeman--
Can I still be law enforcement in its lowest form?"
It says 'Parking Services' on your car door,
But I'd be better serviced by an Old French Whore.
Even if she gave me the herpes,
Or any other form of a veneral disease.
Because Meter Maids are employed by Satan
[You evil demon]
Meter Maids are hired by Beelzebub.
Meter Maids still smell just like bacon.
[You evil demon]
Meter Maids are hired by Beelzebub, you freaking A-hole.
I called you an A-hole
So write me a ticket.
You think you're so cool
I'd like to kick you.
You are not human.
You meter demon.
When you were just a boy, did your daddy beat you?
And what possessed you long ago to sell your soul?
When you were just a kid, what did your mommy feed you?
I bet she fed you breast-milk from a styrofoam bowl.
And why did your daddy beat you?
And what did your mommy feed you?
And when did the devil meet you?
And whom have you spread your seed to?
Society does not need you.
'Cause babies cry when they see you.
Their mommies cry and they scream, too.
So how does it feel to be you--
Living your life in a never-ending rage,
'Cause the Prince of Darkness only pays you minimum wage?
Meter Maids are Employed by Satan...
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