Story Behind the Song
My wife -- my girlfriend, then -- and I used to walk the boardwalk in Asbury Park during the deepest, darkest days of the city, when all movement was downward and the prospect of a better future looked dim if not nonexistent. I would go there, with her and sometimes also by myself, just to commune with the spirits of what once was and what could have been, hoping and praying for what we believed truly could be, but sometimes it would get so hopeless that she would tell me, when planning to go out at night, that she doesn't want to spend any time lamenting the desolation -- she needs to be among the living. In this tune, that desire is voiced, but also that the city itself should be the place where one can once more feel alive.
Recorded March 4, 2003 at Retromedia Studios, Red Bank, NJ
Engineered and mixed by John Noll
Piano and vocal -- The Hesh
Bass -- Steve Lopresto
Drums -- Rick Oricchio
Lyrics
I'm going out tonight
In search of something I can't place
It's out there but out of sight
An entity without a face
I feel the night outside calling me
I can't figure out what it wants me to do
But its power is enthralling me
And it's a force I'm going to pursue
Oh, I want to feel alive tonight
Oh, I want to touch life tonight
I'm going out tonight
Looking for the lifeline that's long been hidden
To turn all that's wrong into right
And I won't take the wrongs as given.
Baby you know sometimes I feel so paralyzed
Sometimes I'm left feeling so frozen
With the dream in sight but out of reach, I'm tantalized
And I wonder why I've been chosen
To walk through the trash, among the ruins
Sifting through the wreckage looking for that spark
And listening for long-gone sounds and archaic tunes
That echo through the old buildings from the beach to the park
Oh, I want to feel alive tonight
Oh, I want to touch life tonight
I want to break this routine that adds up to suffocation
I'm tired of watching the fruits of my labor keep shriveling
I don't want to be surrounded by decay and desolation
Tonight I need to be among the living.
Procrastination, procrastination
Leaves me feeling like nothing gets done
Frustration, vexation
About the things I lost but should have won
Spend a lifetime falling back
Farther and farther from where I want to be
Railroaded, diverted, sidetracked
All sorts of hidden forces stalling me
Oh, I want to feel alive tonight
Oh, I want to touch life tonight
Well I drove these streets a hundred thousand times
In search of something to reverse the negative
I'm not just going to sit around waiting for the moment to strike me
Tonight I'm just going to go out and live.
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