"Chip Wonder" genre: Parodies
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	A parody of Carla Ulbrich's "Boy Wonder". Check out Carla's other works at www.carlau.com.
	Credits: Lyrics by Tony Fabris, music by Carla Ulbrich.
	Story Behind the Song Carla Ulbrich is a wonderful singer and songwriter who does very clever and funny songs with a country-ish flavor. She's also an excellent guitarist. Her web site can be found at www.carlau.com, and her album ("Her Fabulous Debut") is an instant classic. Buy it now, don't hesitate. Carla discovered Filking at GaFilk 2001 after having spent most of her life tolerating "folky angst" performing in bars and coffee houses. Although she still does the "real gigs" for a living, you'll occasionally find her at a Filk convention, getting her fill of people actually appreciating her songs. Some of her tunes have already been filked by several others in the community, so I decided I should do the same. "Boy Wonder" is my favorite song from her album. It was originally a true story about an 11-year-old boy who graduated from college. The irony is that the boy wasn't a genius or a savant, he just gave up his childhood in order to do all the hard work. In other words, it didn't mean a thing. For the parody, it was easy to think of something in our daily lives which requires a lot of time and energy, but doesn't really do anything useful for us. Lyrics Chip Wonder by Tony Fabris to the tune of "Boy Wonder", by Carla Ulbrich (c) 2002 Tony Fabris It was 1981 when I burst upon the scene, with my promise of a new world, of an office paper-free. With just 16k of mem'ry, and a 5-inch floppy drive, and my Big Blue Iron heritage, the future had arrived. I'm the chip wonder, you all know my name. I'm the PC wonder, with a 4 megahertz brain. They talk about chip wonder, productivity I'll bring. But I'm the chip wonder, I can't really do a thing. Beebeep beebeep... In '84, the world watched my ad on Superbowl 18, I had a mouse, a 3-inch floppy, and a high rez graphic screen. Words like WYSIWYG and GUI went into the lexicon, and 'cause I was so user-friendly, imitations I would spawn. I'm the chip wonder, you all know my name. I'm the Mac wonder, with an 8 megahertz brain. They talk about chip wonder, productivity I'll bring. But I'm the chip wonder, and I still can't do a thing. Beebeep beebeep... Beebeep beebeep... In the '90s we got Windows and the Gates monopoly. I just kept on getting faster, my speed doubled annually. Though this exponential growth was matched in storage and in RAM, speed alone can't compensate for Bill's Big Master Scam: The big Blue Screen of Death, and the File/Save that fails. Printer drivers crashing, applications run like snails. Page fault error boxes, system takes a year to boot. Have to close most programs with a three-finger-salute. System won't shut down, and the popup ads won't quit. I'm a thousand times faster, but I still run like shit. So you've wasted all my power running bloated software code, And then once or twice a year you have to format and reload. Now you're all still spending thousands on your upgrades even though it takes as long to type a memo as it did twenty years ago. I'm the chip wonder, look what I became: A tool for some Seattle prep-school geek to yank your chain. I bring you nothing more than an old typewriter would bring. Yeah I'm the chip wonder, and I never did a thing. Beebeep beebeep...

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