Story Behind the Song
Lately I have been feeling down and my spiritual walk has been a struggle, and this song has come of the back of that. If I wanna have a close walk with God then I gotta take up my cross. It's as simple as that, because I've found that when I try to do things my way then I fall into depression - but my joy comes when I look unto the Lord.
Thanks again to Math for the chorus - it sounds ill - fits the song perfectly!!
Thanks also to Aaron (A-Ron) Wiebe for production - http://artists.mp3s.com/artists/268/beatshackproductions.html
Lyrics
A public outcry, I'm out by, the church gates, it's Thursday
So what am I even doing here in the first place?
Amidst commotion, I sit quoting, the daily news
If you can't save yourself, how'd you hope to save me too?
I'm making do, with scraps I receive
Relapsing into dreams, that all colapse into the sea
Perhaps I'll be, someone to look up tp
I'm stuck too if it wasn't for me it'd be just you
My pride denies those about to curse me
Do I hide or reside in a house of mercy?
Let me name perish, this fame is devillish
To me life and music's the same, I'll never quit
I claim benevolance, my claims hold no weight
Don't they, now you know, seem so fake
Hope may, be all I've got left
If I were to try to climb, you could watch my death
You can't see me, you can't be me
Til you take up your cross, you can't believe
My stand is weak, my hands diseased
Take up your cross, if you believe me
I'm all alone now I've got no home now
My whole world has stopped, still I need to slow down
Close round, listen I got a story to tell
About religion and fiction, gory and hell
What about Tha Pastor? Well you know he's Welsh
But have you ever seen him at his lowest ebb?
I'm lost without the Lord, slaughtered by the swords
Of self greed, help me, cornered by it all
Finally I gotta face it find my place and take it
Hide my face, it's wasted denying faith is hatred
Still, chasing dreams, still chasing nightmares
If I find what's mine, I'll take it right there
Saying silent prayers do you hear me Lord??
Awakening blindly scared, I'm clearly caught
On barbed wire, my hands are bloody
Outstreched, found blessed, if someone could love me
You can't see me, you can't be me
Til you take up your cross, you can't believe
My stand is weak, my hands diseased
Take up your cross, if you believe me
I got responsibilities, sailed foreign seas
It's quiet, pause to breathe, hear God caling me
Dear Lord, do you even know how much I suffer?
My son, do you even know how much I love ya??
Are you telling me you're so narrow minded
After all I've done for you, you now show blindness
Lord, it's alone I'm blind, alone I find
Well to be honest, I'm alone most the time
My son, you ain't alone, your concern's misplaced
I'm right here with you, you just turned away
I've heard you pray, you've got the church to save
And I'll give you the power if you search my ways
My faith's refreshed, questions gone
The Lord's given blessings and lessons in this song
I don't deserve you Lord, why'd you keep me alive?
No you don't deserve, that's why Jesus died
You can't see me, you can't be me
Til you take up your cross, you can't believe
My stand is weak, my hands diseased
Take up your cross, if you believe me
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