"Porn Star"  Parental Advisory genre: General Comedy
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	Actual Title:"What Happened When Dick Johnson Fell in Love with Candy Luscious"
	CD: Mr. Thingee Writhes Again   Label: Mr. Thingee Music Credits: C. J. Stetka
	Story Behind the Song This is a song portraying Dick Johnson's inner struggle as he expresses his love for Candy Luscious, a fellow porn star. Song was written in an office cubicle while actual work had to wait. Took about 20 minutes. Song was recorded in 2 takes-one for guitars, one for vocals. (We're on a budget). Lyrics When the bass starts thumpin, But before we get to humpin, I try to think of sumthin To say "I'm here to clean the pool!" Hey, that sounds pretty cool Would you please hand me that tool? Okay! Cause I'm a Porn Star Such a lovely life Porn Star Please don't tell my wife Porn Star Got me lots of monies Porn Star Yeah I get paid to hump the honies Now when I'm doing you Candy And your twin sister Sandy It sure is feelin dandy And something more Cause you see I really love ya And I can't stop dreaming of ya As I dangle here above ya My lucious little whore Cause you're my Porn Star My tattooed little chick Porn Star Let me show you my... Love Porn Star I'm gonna make you mine Porn Star Here's my next line... Somebody order a pizza? With extra sausage Big package for Mrs. Goodlove. Shall I deliver it in the rear? Darlin, could you come on in here? I want you to take some dic-tation Plumber's here, ma'am Where do you want me to lay this pipe? Well, I'm big and muscle bound And you make that squeaky sound As I toss your ass around And sigh Your boobs don't move a bit Silicone behind each tit But I don't give a shit Know why? Cause we are Porn Stars! Turn the camera on Porn Stars And do it on the lawn Porn Stars Ever tried this position? Porn Stars Trust me, I'm a physician Captain, waiting for your signal to launch Steady, steady, go! Oh, Captain Dick, nobody's ever been there before Why yes, Candy. I'll be the first man to send a probe to Uranus Porn Stars I knows I ain't that bright Porn Stars But I gets it five times a night Porn Stars Now you ought to stick to me Porn Stars And you will always be a Porn Star

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